Forget being worthy, it’s all about sex (and party bags … and cubby houses).
I had a sneaking suspicion things were going in that direction when I scored my most-ever blog views in a day – just last week – for a post I wrote called A Funny Thing Happened When I Talked About Sex.
When the Google search avalanche struck, I pondered:
Maybe I should give up writing from the heart and just write about sex every day?
Hmmmm … I wonder if there are any ad dollars in that?
Well, according to About Money: “It’s been said that as human beings, we have a lizard or reptilian brain that responds to certain primal urges. Food is one. Sex and reproduction is definitely another. This underlying, pre-programmed disposition to respond to sexual imagery is so strong, it has been used for over 100 years in advertising.”
Writer Paul Suggett goes on to note: “Yes, sex sells. It’s a fact. Popular mens magazines like Maxim and FHM have experimented often with their covers. Overwhelmingly, when a sexy, semi-naked woman appears on the cover, it outperforms an image of a male star, even if that star is someone men want to read about.”
But, it made for an awkward moment on Christmas Day when my father-in-law asked how the blog was going and I – for some inexplicable reason – said “Well, eight of my top 10 blogs of the year were about sex …”
You know what it’s like when you try and dig yourself out of a hole and it just keeps getting deeper? It was like that … AND it was a conversation with my father-in-law … AND explaining that it all started with a blog about dino porn was SUCH a bad idea …
Anyways … On with the show …
This post was about how an old blog called Ever Imagined Being Ravished By A Triceratops? … about a pair of female writers making a killing out of e-books about virgins being shagged by dinosaurs (yes, really), which went totally ape after a show called Blackish mentioned something called “the triceratops position” (the triceratops had three horns … I’ll let you guess the rest …)
It’s been bubbling along in my blog stats ever since and, after last week’s spike (I’m presuming Blackish got a repeat, how festive), has now taken top honours as my all-time biggest success with 25,183 views and counting.
Apparently if you Google “triceratops sex position” HouseGoesHome is number 3 and 4 search result in the world. I. Am. So. Proud.
This one was about how when I went bar hopping with a married couple in Newcastle “turned the conversation to where I always turn it socially these days – sex.”
Fortunately the conversation doesn’t turn towards sex quite so frequently at the moment … I think it was a being-separated-after-23-years-in-a-relationship blip.
Another oldie … involving an oldie … Two days after his wife of 17 years, Dina, announced the couple had separated, 83-year-old Clint Eastwood was photographed in Los Angeles with his girlfriend, 42-year-old Erica Tomlinson-Fisher. It turns out Erica was married to Dina’s longtime friend, basketball coach Scott Fisher until she suspected her husband and Dina of having an affair … A source told US Weekly: “Erica called Clint’s office last February to discuss her suspicions — then he fell for her!” Dina, 48, apparently wasn’t romantically involved with Scott THEN but the pair started casually dating after their exes got together.
Complicated, I know. I think it’s just the “wife swaps” concept that reels them in … Then confuses them.
This back files blog about Sandra’s awesome thighs in Gravity – and how much I envy them – just keeps on giving.
Last year’s most-clicked blog moves to fifth place.
Another top 10 entrant from last year.
The dino porn blog that started it all …
Nice to see Aussie celebs scoring so many clicks.
I have NO idea why this blog is so popular. Is it the idea of someone urinating on that insufferable man? It also discusses Gwyneth and Chris consciously uncoupling … maybe THAT was it?
This one’s about the hot 40-year-old who “kissed” me on RSVP and got me all excited … until I read his profile. Here’s what he said: “Am here looking for the right woman the will accept me for who I am and not for what I have, a very nice, honest, caring, understanding, submissive who will love me till the rest of my life.”
Submissive!!!! He sounded so lovely up until that point.
But I’m presuming the people clicking think I was talking about something MUCH naughtier.
Hey bloggers out there, tell me: what was the blog that scored the most clicks for you in 2015? Non-bloggers: was there a post that made you laugh or cry this year (doesn’t have to be one of mine, always love discovering great writers).
Song of the day: Tom Jones “Sex Bomb”