There’s hope for me yet

A friend suggested to me last week that I become an influencer as my next career move …. bwhahahaha …

But I stopped laughing yesterday when I read that “granfluencers” are the hot new trend in brand promotion.

A marketing mob called HypeAuditor have given their predictions for 2022 and noted that there’s been a rise of petfluencers, skinfluencers, and granfluencers.

Eye roll … but tell me more …

A “granfluencer” is a web-savvy senior who can apparently racking up thousands, even millions, of Instagram followers — along with piles of money.

As the New York Post headlines it: “Senior citizen granfluencers are making it rain on Instagram”.

Here I was thinking I was too old to be an influencer … maybe I’m just too middle aged and simply need to wait a few more years for my time to come.

92-year-old Helen Ruth Elam — known as baddiewinkle (pictured main) on Instagram – rocks an arsenal of flamboyant feather boas, sunglasses and other colourful couture. First hitting the internet’s radar at the ripe old age of 85, she currently boasts 3.6 million Instagram followers and sponsorships that net her up to $9815 per promo.

The blokes are blitzing it in too – 59-year-old educator Irvin Randle – aka Mr Steal Your Grandmother – generates upwards of $1000 for his promos.

I find it slightly disturbing that 59 is considered a ripe age for stealing grandmothers. That said, I technically could have been a granny many times over by now, if I hadn’t left it until I was 35 to pop out my first sprog.

Maybe I’d better crack out my “live beauty light” again … after losing interest a few weeks back in becoming a TikTok star.

Not that it’s going to make me rich – on average, influencers earn US$2970 per month from their Instagram account, while micro-influencers (between 1000-10,000 followers) earn on average US$1420 per month, and influencers with more than one million followers only average US$15,536 per month.

As a result, only 4% of them live on income from an account. Considering I’m whatever type of influencer is five rungs lower than a micro-influencer in the food chain, I’m not giving up my freelance career just yet.

But I am stoked that older people are finally making brands sit up and take notice. I find it infuriating that so few advertisers are interested in appealing to mature audiences. It’s a real struggle for publications with older readers to attract ad dollars.

It makes absolutely NO SENSE, since those mature audiences are often the ones with the most money to splash around on products.

Well, apart from yours truly, who has holes in her gym trainers and can’t afford to replace her shite box of a Renault, which is just about to head back to the repair centre because it has started to shudder like a rocket re-entering the atmosphere every time I put the brakes on.

But life ain’t too shabby when you can head to Clareville Beach on a school night to eat fish and chips on the sand while sipping a glass of sparkling wine and watching the sunset …

Last night was bliss!

Song of the day: The Fab Four “When I’m 64”

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