Cover your eyes, kids

I’m admonished occasionally for being too frank and honest on the blog.

People say stuff like: “Put it in a private diary, not on the internet!”

And: “Think of your kids!”

Or: “What if the kids read your blog one day?”

I try to be mindful of that … though, really, I reckon they’ll find it way too middle-aged and boring to bother.

On the other hand, I’ve been horrified by what some other mums have been posting on social media recently.

Does that make me a big, fat hypocrite?

For example, mum of four Heidi Klum posted THIS on Instagram yesterday …

heidi-klum

Um, hello?

Really?

Muuuuuuuuuuum!!!! Noooooooo!!!!!

Seriously – what possessed her?

I’ve also decided my blog is very, very tame – despite the dinosaur sex stuff – after reading a story written by a mum – who’s also a blogger – for Cosmopolitan.com on how much she loves sex toys.

She shared it on her Facebook page with the write off: “To my parents and in-laws- you might want to skip this one.”

Minor understatement.

I suppose it’s great that someone’s prepared to be so open about their naughty collection …

Before I knew it, I didn’t have so much a drawer full of sex toys as I did a steamer trunk. Ropes, handcuffs, strap-ons, butt plugs, anal beads, vibrators, nipple clamps, cock rings, ball gags, pillow gags, O gags, hoods, spreader bars, floggers, Fleshlights, paddles, riding crops, cock sheaths, Ben Wa balls, snake bite kits, bondage tape, bits, and bridles…

And dildos. Dildos that gyrate, that vibrate, that self-thrust; attached to gags and holsters and kneepads and suction cups. Short ones, skinny ones, massive ones; dildos that look like gophers and statues and dinosaurs.

Vibrators disguised as rubber duckies and lipstick and dolls and pieces d’art.

But, really, does anyone really want to read that about their friend/daughter/mother?

Awkward …

(And what the hell ARE some of those things anyway? Sheltered life!)

Am I being a prude/hypocrite?

Song of the day: Kajagoogoo “Too shy”

 

 

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4 thoughts on “Cover your eyes, kids

  1. No you’re not being a prude. There are really some things that should be a little private. I would be horrified if I was reading my mother’s blog and found out that the drawer that I thought she hid lollies and chocolates in was really filled with sex toys. On the other hand I did write a post once about an ultrasound that went from being trans-dermal to intra-vaginal. Not sure how my sons felt about that one.

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