My week: I wanna be a cowgirl

I was going to call this blog “My week: kinda sucked” but I thought it might turn people off.

Being gazumped and packing 23 years of my life up weren’t the most awesome ways to spend a week, although I DID manage to buy the most awesome pair of cowboy boots as a divorce present to myself. So all was not lost.

cowgirl

A little obsessed with the western theme, I shared a photograph of myself on Facebook yesterday dressed up as a four-year-old cowgirl (my mother, bless her, reckons I was the most gorgeous child EVER, but I think this photo proves I was SO not). The fetish has stayed with me. I remember mum almost DYING when I returned from a holiday at my grandmother’s with a black cowboy hat perched on my head. Good God, what if the neighbours saw me???

In my early 20s I invested in my first pair of real cowboy boots. I freaking loved those cowboy boots. Six weeks after I met Husband we went on holidays together to Malaysia and Thailand. I’d never been overseas before, so I didn’t realise cowboy boots and the equator didn’t mix. They stayed in the backpack the whole time. Geez they were heavy.

Somehow over the years, I lost those beloved cowboy boots. I’d been hoping they’d turn up in the attic but no such luck. Which brings me to these babies currently winging their way from the US of A …

cowboy boots

Noice, huh?

As for the blog, here’s what went down …

cruise

>> The week started (and ended) with tears. I cried on Monday in a post called I Am Loved, as I spent countless more hours clearing out the freaking attic. The tears weren’t about the mess – though that’s worth a weep – they were about the discoveries. So much love for me in all the old cards and letters momentos. And I never really trusted in it. As for the boys I am perched upon in the pic, they were a cute posse I  met on Fairstar The Fun Ship with my sister and I. Upon reflection, my sister has realised Fred, the one who fancied her, wasn’t too bad looking after all.

wedding speech

>> Then I posted an excerpt from My Wedding Speech.

I also did a thing at the gym called “Rip”. Rip involves a metal post with elastic things hanging off it. Each elastic thing has a metal bar attached and you do strange exercises with it, like pretend to play hockey. When I saw it I thought it was ridiculous. Afterwards, I couldn’t walk properly for the next four days, as my muscles screamed “Holy mother of god, what WAS that?”

courtyard

>> Then House Narrowly Avoided Homelessness by renting this little semi. Gawd knows what it looks like inside, I can’t remember. But it will be home sweet home for at least the next six months.

Black-Knight-monty-python

>> On Thursday, I pondered whether I was Invincible or Loony. I’ve been feeling that the Black Knight is a kindred spirit. Although after later reading the scene from the Anthrax Palace, I’m wishing I’d pressed rewind on it after the kids went to bed – the eldest had heard it was rude and anxiously insisted I fast forward – because it sounds hilarious …

Dingo: Yes. Yes, you must give us all a good spanking. And after the spanking, the oral sex.
Galahad: Well, I could stay a bit longer.
[Sir Lancelot crashes in, grabs Galahad and rushes out of the castle]
Lancelot: We were in the nick of time. You were in great peril.
Galahad: I don’t think I was.
Lancelot: Yes, you were. You were in terrible peril.
Galahad: Look, let me go back in there and face the peril.
Lancelot: No, it’s far too perilous.
Galahad: Look, it’s my duty as a knight to sample as much peril as I can.
Lancelot: No, we’ve got to find the Holy Grail. Come on.
Galahad: Oh, let me have just a little bit of peril?
Lancelot: No. It’s unhealthy.
Galahad: I bet you’re gay.
Lancelot: No, I’m not.

nicki-minaj-butt

>> And on Friday I noted that a gazillion celebs were flashing their butts on social media in HouseGoesHollywood. (I agree with Pinky Poinker, that looks OUCHY.)

sold-sign1

>> Saturday was another weepy one, with Tips For The Newly Separated Selling Their Houses (don’t do it with PMT, waaaaaaah).

And over at escape.com.au …

>>11 cruise activities that will blow your kids’ minds.

>> In honour of the Commonwealth Games, an Insider’s Guide to Glasgow.

naya-rivera

>> All the romantic details from Glee star Naya Rivera’s beach wedding in Mexico >> http://bit.ly/1nWB7gK
cheese
>> My lovely friend Rachel Morris let me share her blog about Amsterdam, with me noting that the city may be best known for its space cookies, but the cheeses are out of this world, too! Here’s how you can sample the best >>http://bit.ly/1ugKJMW
>> Then there’s the Luxe Celeb Escape You CAN Afford.
fried pizza
>> Would you eat deep-fried pizza and chips? It’s just one of the freaky foods on offer at the Glasgow Commonwealth Games. As for what the Scots do with haggis … click here to be horrified >> http://bit.ly/1mClf2I
>> Looking for a warm winter escape? Try these seven holiday spots where it’s still over 25C.
 kris-jenner
>> Critics are saying Kim Kardashian’s mum should be ashamed of this selfie. Do you agree? Click here to decide >> http://bit.ly/1zWkonI
laura-dundovic-bikini
>> HOW many swimsuits do YOU take on holiday? Bet it’s not as many as Getaway host Laura Dundovic, who took EIGHT cossies on hers. Check ’em all out here >> http://bit.ly/1ljXP2j
How was your week?
Song of the week: Boys Don’t Cry “I wanna be a cowboy”

2 thoughts on “My week: I wanna be a cowgirl

  1. Nice boots! Next there’ll be a horse!
    My divorce present to me (well, a separation present, actually…divorce took another 6 or 7 years!) was a Wingback Chesterfield Chair. She hated anything Chesterfield. I love it!
    I had a flat out week and sold NINE cars…didn’t even have time to read about Hollywood Butts! 😉

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