What fresh hell is this?


Remember how my kids swore off sucrose after seeing That Sugar Film last week?

Well, geez it’s a pain. Though I couldn’t help giggling when my ex sent me a message on Saturday saying he wasn’t thanking the youngest’s skipping instructor for showing it to her.

She was insistent that he accommodate her new diet immediately upon her arrival, whereas the eldest was happy to take a “I’ll start it when I get back to mum’s place” approach.

Surprisingly, going sugar free turns out to be both expensive and labour intensive.

The youngest and I spent $160 at Woolies on Tuesday, setting ourselves up (OK, she might have scammed me for some eraseable pens as well).

Then I trekked home with it all, unpacked it, laboriously cooked dinner, and embarked on a sugar-free muffin baking experiment. I used honey, butter, eggs, milk, wholemeal flour and grated apple. The eldest pronounced them delicious, the youngest turned her nose up because she didn’t like the texture of the grated apple.

Feeding a fussy sugar-free child is going to be sooooo much fun.

Yesterday morning was an epic food-assembling exercise. First the kids: tubs of tzaziki and vegetable crudites for morning tea, sliced fruit and chicken salad for lunch. Then me: yoghurt and nuts for breakfast, packing a serve of leftover Mexican baked eggs and brown rice for lunch, distilling a 1/4 of a cup of grape juice into a water bottle (I hate the taste of water), mixing my eco-cup of iced coffee with stevia and lactose-free milk for the train; then the dogs: lamb mince and dry dog food for brekkie …

I swear, I was exhausted before I even left the house.


As I was having dinner with DD’s boss at Aqua Dining in North Sydney last night – now there’s a view that pulls out all the stops for someone who’s never visited Sydney before – I got another hilarious text from my ex, who’d just discovered the youngest was not only sugar free but also taking part in Steptember, which involves her having to walk 10,000 steps a day to raise money for celebral palsy.


His verdict: “First sugar! Now exercise! Fuck all this wellbeing shit.”

Song of the day: INXS “Just keep walking”



14 thoughts on “What fresh hell is this?

  1. Love this. So funny. You must be loving those texts from your ex! Your youngest sounds like a real powerhouse of motivation. Good on her. Wow – so impressed. Did you know September was officially hash tagged as #sugarfreeseptember? I almost started it but I’m not ready – damn. I knew about Steptember, but I struggle to even do 6,000 steps a day at the moment. Good on you though for giving sugar-free a go with your kids – I can see that it is extra work and cost. I really need to learn the difference between all the sugars. Fructose is the bad one, right? But ok in fruit as the fibre slows down the fructose? Is honey just glucose? Sorry, I really should do my own research.

    • I am a bit dodgy on the different sugars. They are mainly giving up fructose in things like yogurt and sucrose hidden in processed foods. When I went sugar free for health reasons I couldn’t eat any of the “toses.” Geez that was a miserable two years

      • I bet it was miserable with no “toses”. I’m a bit dodgy on the differences too. All I know is I’m trying to cut down on sugar in general for weight loss reasons. Did OK today but still had to have my 1 Weetbix for brekkie.

      • Didn’t I mention the natural Greek yoghurt and fruit I put on the Weetbix? I couldn’t just have one Weetbix by itself! I also need to do something about my belly. I’ve started skipping carbs at lunch (i.e. just protein and salad).

      • I am more and more aware of my belly, and keep saying, “something MUST be done” too. Julia Morris gave up white flour and sugar and look at her now. I’m just going to try to get through one day and see how I go. Shame I keep craving breakfast cereal! And Cronuts.

  2. Ha ha ha. Let’s hope that all this sugar-free stuff wears off soon and you can go back to your previously scheduled eating. Food shouldn’t be such hard work.

  3. You must tell her that sugar was made to taste sweet so we’d eat it! It comes from a plant. It’s hilarious how they latch on to things. You should start an online betting thing where we all guess how long before she caves and gives it all up. I’ll give it another week 🙂

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