I did my grocery shopping yesterday sans underwear … Now that I have your attention (come to think of it, the title probably did that anyway, ah well) let me rewind …
Before grocery shopping, I went to my friend Mel’s house to get a spray tan for my party. She’s a DIY spray tan junkie and has all the proper gear.
When I arrived, the front door was ajar, so I wandered into the kitchen and found Mel naked in her pop-up spray-tan tent, with my friend Penny pointing a tanning gun at her.
As you do on a Friday morning in suburbia.
God I love suburbia, it’s waaaaay more fun than legend would have you believe.
Ten minutes later, Mel stepped out of the pop-up spray tan booth and gave herself a thorough once over, still naked, with a hairdryer.
That was my cue to strip naked and stand in the pop-up tent while Penny sprayed me and made lots of positive comments about my weight-loss (bless her). She also noted that I was much more relaxed about the whole naked with another woman thing than I was last time she sprayed me. Losing 10kg tends to do that, as does my new go-with-the-flow attitude to life post-separation.
It’s a very intimate procedure too. Lots of elaborate leg turning so your inner thighs get a nice, even coverage.
Then I stood naked in the kitchen and gave myself a blow dry while Penny stripped for her spray tan.
Normslly, blow-drying myself naked in someone’s kitchen while chatting to other naked women would totally freak me out. I’m not a public nudity kind of gal. I do an elaborate shimmy under my towel when I take off my cossie in public swimming pool dressing rooms.
But Penny and Mel have no such inhibitions because they see each other naked every week or so while performing their mutual spray tans. So I went with it and it felt remarkably fine, no biggie.
Although, when I started giggling at the absurdity of it, they did agree it WAS pretty out-there from a newbie perspective.
Afterwards, just so I didn’t get any nasty fake-tan lines, I shrugged on a loose dress – sans undies and bra – and went grocery shopping at Woolies for cabanossi, cheese cubes, Lollygobble Blissbombs etc for my party.
Then I headed to the bottle shop for a few packs of alcoholic nostalgia in the form of West Coast Cooler and various spirits and made cheery conversation with the blokes behind the till.
It felt a bit freaky too. But again, I went with it. And it was fine. Though a sudden gust of wind could have been disastrous.
I met another school mum friend on the way back to my car and cheerily announced – post 500ml of sugar-free V – that I wasn’t wearing any underwear.
She looked briefly startled, but luckily she’s every bit as no-filter and TMI as me – god I love her for it – so she recovered pretty quickly.
That was my Friday … How was yours?
PS Click here to read my first Naked And Alone With A Woman experience.
PPS There’s an outside chance I’ll have one of my rare no blog days tomorrow. If that happens, don’t worry. I’m not dead, just sleeping. Party, party, party!!!!
I reckon this post might just go viral Alana. I can imagine a lot of sweaty men reading this right now 🙂