I wrote that!

I was sitting at one of the World’s 50 Best Bars – Caretaker’s Cottage in Melbourne – on Saturday afternoon when the coolest thing happened.

I glanced out the window and saw my Melbourne Cocktails book lying on one of the bar’s outside tables with a patron, covered in Post-It tabs.

I was visiting Melbourne briefly for DD’s work Xmas party and we squeezed in a Christmas bevvy with my former sister and brother in law.

Everyone was initially confused by what I was squeaking excitedly about, but once they understood I was having a moment of fleeting fame, Deb said we had to go outside to get a selfie with the bloke.

It turns out he’d bought the book and sent it to a friend in Europe to convince him that he must visit Melbourne, then decided to buy a copy for himself as well.

He lamented that a few of the bars had closed and that the drink submitted to the book by Caretaker’s Cottage was no longer available to order. But generally he seemed happy with his purchase.

I was happy with my purchase too. The Champagne Pina Colada with white rum, Archie Rose white cane, pineapple, coconut sorbet and sparkling wine was deeeeeelicious.

Caretaker’s Cottage is a tiny bluestone cottage that was once a caretaker’s quarters. It’s been tucked away in the middle of town since 1914 and is now a pumping bar that’s gaining global attention.

Afterwards, we wandered over to an Asian-fusion restaurant called Seamstress for the most wonderful banquet menu featuring delightful morsels including sweet potato & snake bean poached wonton with green pea puree; Crispy pork belly, fiery red dragon sauce, peanuts, cashews & Vietnamese mint salad; Braised beef short rib, plum-hoisin sauce & beetroot pickled cabbage; Crispy soft shell crab, wasabi mayo, red cabbage & papaya slaw with nam jim dressing; and Crispy Brussels sprouts, white miso glaze & togarashi.

We loved every mouthful.

But the fun didn’t stop there. While there was a very cool bar upstairs at Seamstress (above), we had our sights set on going to one of Melbourne’s best whisky bars, Whisky and Alement, for a nightcap.

I sipped something with Maker’s Mark and a honey foam on top that was very yummy. Unfortunately I forgot to photograph its name and the ingredients, dammit.

As for DD’s Christmas party, it was held on Friday night at a pleasant but unremarkable Curtis Stone function room in Richmond.

We caught a cab straight from the airport for a pre-party prosecco at a lovely wine bar called Annie Lewis.

Then on Saturday morning we met our cruise buddies Derek and Aileen for a cup of tea followed by lunch at the RACV.

You may vaguely recall me mentioning that Aileen represented Australia in figure skating at the 1962 Olympics.

After lunch we had to race to Myer to get DD a jumper because it was freezing in Melbourne and he wasn’t prepared, given it was boiling in Sydney.

Fast-forward to Sunday morning and we dashed to the airport, landed, made a brief trip to a Christmas warehouse, grabbed lunch and headed up the highway to a Christmas party in Newcastle. Two hours up, two hours there, two hours back.

Knackered.