I peed in a vase yesterday.
Circumstance left me with no choice.
I wake up each morning around 5.45am, desperate to do a wee.
But I hold that thought because if I make a sound the dogs will start barking and scratching at the laundry door, demanding I take them for a walk.
So I cross my legs while I publish my blog post and skim social media. Around 6.30am, I hastily pull on my gym gear and dash to the bathroom.
Yesterday, however, I heard an ominous noise as I was tying my shoelaces.
Someone shut the bathroom door.
That was odd. My children never emerge from bed before 7.30am.
I realised it must be a friend of the eldest’s who had stayed over.
No problem, I thought, I will just cross my legs for a minute longer.
Then I heard the shower start and panicked.
I was BUSTING to go to the loo. BUSTING.
I scurried out of my bedroom and looked around wildly for a solution.
I flung the balcony door open and seriously considered using the grass pet potty. I scoped the street to estimate how many people might be watching if I dropped my dacks and did an al fresco wee.
I ran back inside and contemplated the laundry sink.
I dashed into the kitchen and started rifling through the Tupperware cupboard.
Plastic takeaway container?
Too gross to ever bake with again.
I eyed a vase on the kitchen bench.
Time was running out. It would have to do. I put it on the floor.
Then I picked up the very full vase and thought Now what?
The shower was still running, which meant the bathroom was out of bounds.
So I put the wee vase in the laundry sink and took the dogs for a walk.
It’s all glamour at my place.
Song of the day: Wilson Phillips “Hold on”
that’s gotta be on a sit-com somewhere……
The song of the day is gold!