Off with the fairies

It has been a few nights since I slept properly, which means I am even vaguer than usual.

I think it’s a combination of stress and menopause that’s keeping me awake.

It’s pretty full on at work in the lead up to caretaker mode before the election. Trying to juggle that with parenting, pets and other life stuff is the opposite of fun.

I staggered out of bed yesterday morning in a haze of exhaustion and was walking zombie-like around the streets with the dogs when someone pulled up beside me, called my name and waved.

It was a friend who I’d invited over to see my new place and have coffee at 7am.

And I had completely forgotten.

Oooops.

I have no idea how you forget a 7am catch-up. I have a vague recollection of thinking I’d better tell her to text me rather than buzz from downstairs – so she didn’t wake the kids – but then my brain went off with the fairies.

I could have fudged it and said I was just taking the dogs for a quick wee, but I am a very bad liar, so I admitted I had forgotten, apologised and escorted her upstairs.

Later, when the youngest emerged from bed, she admonished me for doing all my Teams meetings without my headphones plugged in, as it meant she was roused from slumber by my loud conversation.

I had been in several Teams meetings by that point while wearing headphones. I felt like such a dill.

Again, I was so blurry that I apologised and started fiddling around with the headphones, trying to establish why they weren’t working. They were plugged in correctly, which is when I realised the youngest had been woken by the actual conversation I had in my lounge room at 7am.

It just hadn’t occurred to her in a million years that I would be socializing at the crack of dawn.

And the rest of the day passed in a blur. My head hurt. My eyes hurt. I counted down the hours until bedtime.

I slept a little better last night, although my slumber was marred by the last gasping breaths of menopause symptoms, which woke me at regular intervals and demanded that I go to the bathroom, turn the fan on, turn the fan off etc

And today I am dragging myself into the office with a packet of Nurofen and a strong flat white.

I really need a mini break from responsibility. (A maxi break would be even better, but that ain’t happening in HSC year.)

Working on it … stay tuned …

Song of the day: Imagine Dragons “Believer”