Stranger things

There are so many rules in NSW these days, I’m having trouble deciding whether I’m following them correctly.

The wowsers would say it’s easy to follow the rules during hard lockdown: just stay home.

But we’ve been in lockdown for a loooooong time now, and we’re going slightly kooky at home.

For example, I published a blog post yesterday about my crotch, which was not terribly well received and only managed half the traffic HouseGoesHome is accustomed to receiving. My sense of humour has gone off piste during these troubled times, though a few people said it made them laugh.

As for the kids, the youngest spent yesterday morning simultaneously attending a virtual geography class while making spinach fettucine; and the eldest worked on his HSC art major work while concocting homemade deodorant with charcoal sourced from DD’s firepit. The eldest dresses exclusively in black, so I’m hoping the stains won’t show up too much.

The major work is evolving at a rapid pace. A jar of pickled snake bones and a dead cicada have been removed, as they contravene the submission rules. But there’s still A LOT of strange stuff being arranged in boxes.

At lunchtime, the youngest and I went our separate ways to our authorised beaches, in celebration of the first day of Spring.

I presume that I’m allowed to go to the beach in my partner’s LGA … and I presume my daughter can’t. So I headed to the Northern Beaches for some Singapore Noodles at DD’s and a dip at Bilgola, which was cold but glorious.

… And the youngest walked 5km to Chinaman’s Beach … where the water was equally cold but glorious.

It’s a pretty steep climb back out of Chinaman’s Beach, so I received a text message begging for a lift home. It’s also a little tricky to find the road down to Chinaman’s Beach – it looks like a one-way street that shouldn’t be entered – so I was pretty grouchy by the time I finally arrived at the carpark.

I was also unimpressed to discover the youngest was beetroot red due to not wearing sunscreen.

The eldest, on the other hand, had to make do with a trip to IGA for some food colouring to stain a timber box for the major work. The box arrived on our doorstep on Tuesday night, filled with tequila samples for a virtual tasting I’m doing this afternoon. Fortuitous.

The Premier admitted yesterday that we won’t be leaving lockdown until at least mid-October, so we have another six-week slog to go.

Ace.

I wonder what new, messy experiments the kids will come up with to pass the time between now and then …

Song of the day: Steve Strange “Fade to Grey”