Birthday cancelled

I’m 53 today. How the hell did that happen? It’s way too soon, I’m not ready.

Normally I feel about 35 on the inside and get a shock when I see my reflection and suddenly remember I’m not.

I’m with Judi Dench, who said in a recent interview with The Guardian that she hates being called a national treasure.

“For one thing,” she said, “it’s a terrible label. So dusty, so dreary. For another, it relegates me to being an 86-year-old woman. Whereas in my mind’s eye I’m 6ft and willowy and about 39.”

Dench added: “Do you know what it’s like? It’s like they’ve picked me up and put me inside a little glass-fronted cabinet. Then they’ve locked the door so I can’t get out.”

When the interviewer told her to “smash the glass and run amok,” Dench said, “Exactly. And f— being 86 years old.”

F— being 53 for that matter. And f —- yeah to smashing things.

I feel very 53 today due to being poorly and I’m very not happy about it. I woke at 3am with a fever so I’m pretty sure my celebrations are cancelled.

I called the doctor yesterday about the super-dooper antibiotic drops not working because I was feeling increasingly shite.

My ear was sore and throbbing, I felt blergh and even deafer than before.

I asked him to fax a prescription to the local pharmacy in the hope I could get the problem under some sort of control.

He said I needed to watch out for side effects while taking the antibiotics and I chirped that yes yes I would get some prebiotics. And he was like, oh, yeah, probably a good idea, but he was actually referring to tendonitis. Apparently there’s a chance my Achillies tendon could rupture while I’m taking the pills.

Sorry, what?

I texted DD about it, which led to a very frustrating conversation where he kept thinking I was either hallucinating or my phone was autocorrecting, because he couldn’t work out how my ankle had anything to do with my ear.

His pharmaceutical knowledge in this area needs a bit of a refresh, as I’ve spoken to Dr Google about it, who tells me the antibiotics I’m taking come with a “black box” warning in the US.

A World Health Organization (WHO) survey in Australia of tendon disorders found the one I’m taking – ciprofloxacin – was found to be the causal agent in 90% of cases.

Ace.

But It would appear the scary antibiotics haven’t worked. Not sure what happens next. Will advise. Considered going to the emergency department at 4am, but decided that was too melodramatic. Took some Nurofen instead and drifted in and out of consciousness until now. Will get the kids off to school then head to the doctor again and beg for assistance.

I’m thinking I won’t be well enough to work, which sucks when you’re a contractor. Ah well, can’t be helped.

Oh in the meantime, if you’d like to give me a birthday gift, make it a like/follow/share or comment on Drinks Digest social media.

Song of the day: Sugarcubes “Birthday”