False alarm

I was meanIng to blog yesterday, but I had a nightmare about work at 3am and woke up in a cold sweat.

I tossed and turned for about 90 minutes, trying to will myself back to sleep. Then I remembered there was half a sleeping tablet buried somewhere on my dressing table from my last major life crisis.

It was around 4.30am by then, but I thought bugger it, I’m sick of feeling sick with tiredness, so I popped it.

A phone call from my sister roused me at 7.30am, asking if we were still going for a walk. Oooops, forgot about that! I scrambled into my gym gear and tottered out of the house to be greeted with a strong flat white. Bless her.

So, no time to blog.

What I was going to blog about was another bed related story. Don’t worry, it’s G-rated …
I thought I was having a major health scare on Friday night. Every time I turned over in bed, I saw flashing lights in the corner of my eye.

Hmmm, I thought to myself, that can’t be good.

But I was really drowsy from taking an antihistamine, so I kept dozing off between flashes.

As the morning dawned, the antihistamine started to wear off and my fears grew. The flashes were really, really pronounced. I decided it was time to consult Dr Google.

Dr Google said flashing lights in the corner of my eye could just be a sign of old age or might mean I needed immediate medical assistance.

Not. Very. Comforting.

As I lay there, grimly pondering my fate, I jiggled a little and thought … hang on … that flashing light in the corner of my eye seems a little … electric.

Anyhoo … It turned out that the switch on my bedside lamp had become jammed between the bed and the bedside table. Every time I turned over, the friction made the lamp flicker …

So I didn’t need to race to the emergency department.

To celebrate, I shopped my feelings at a boutique in DD’s neck of the woods. I’ve often gawped in the window after our Sunday night roasts, but never during business hours.

DD, bless him, took one look at my forlorn face when I arrived at his place on Saturday afternoon and drove me straight there.

We’ve never gone fashion shopping together before, so I was very entertained by the look on his face when I tried to make him go into the store. He shook his head and said he’d wait outside.

I tried on lots of things that would have looked fabulous on a willowy young thing, but made me look like I was wearing a four-man tent.

As I walked disconsolately out of the groovy changeroom, The Warrior loudly greeted me mid-store with a bottle of pink bubbles.

(In case you’ve missed my previous posts about The Warrior, he’s DD’s personal trainer and he’s quite the character.)

He presented me with the pink bubbles, saying he was sorry to hear about my bad week.

I was beyond startled, as were the shop assistants and other customers.

I discovered later that DD had been amusing himself in BWS while I was shopping my feelings and had run into The Warrior on his way out. The Warrior thought it would be bulk funny to grab the pink bubbles out of DD’s box of supplies and surprise me.

That he did.

The bubbles were delicious – Brown Brothers Pink Prosecco – I thoroughly recommend trying a bottle.

After polishing off the bubbles on the deck, we moved to the couch to watch comedy clips. My current favourite is Sarah Millican.

I laughed so much at this one I almost cried (warning, it’s very rude and I would recommend pressing pause before she gets to the gratuitous anal bleaching bit.)

Oh, speaking of funny, have you seen the Hugh Jackman RM Williams ad?

I needed a laugh because I’m still pretty dark about being retrenched.

Poor DD has put up with A LOT of ranting. Though we had the most lovely time yesterday, splashing in the frigid surf and eating lunch in a groovy cafe.

But the fun is over now: wish me luck with the stress of job hunting this week.

And also with my renovation. The washing machine is finally functional, which should have been a cause for celebration, but then I discovered this …

Yep, that’s as far as the washing liquid drawer opens.

FFS.

Song of the day: The Fray “How to save a life”

5 thoughts on “False alarm

  1. Builders that can’t think ‘outside the square’. let alone inside the building… Same as when a man installs a toilet roll holder without sitting on the toilet to see the best spot… Greer… Hope that 1 is fixable

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