Dummy spits and xxx

I spat the dummy around lunchtime yesterday.

I was SOOOOOOOOO freaking over painting my freaking house. And the ceiling STILL looks like absolute shite. I suspect it looks like absolute shite because I didn’t put the lid back on the paint can properly, so the paint has gone a weird consistency from the air getting to it. Or it’s just crap paint. Or I’m just a crap painter.

Whatever the explanation, I HAVE HAD ENOUGH.

Painting will recommence in 2017 sometime. Or I might just wait (forever) and pay someone to do it properly when I win the lottery.

And then there’s Christmas shopping.

I’ve had enough of that too.

I thought I’d solved the final piece of the jigsaw puzzle. Snapfish had been sending me “final days before Christmas, don’t miss out” messages so I ordered some framed photographs of the kids for the relatives.

Snapfish sent confirmation that it had received the order. It gave me an ETA of December 20 for delivery. All freaking fabulous. And then, a few days later, it sent a message saying it couldn’t cope with demand so my order had been cancelled and my money had been refunded. Mind you, it continued spamming my inbox with “don’t miss out on Christmas delivery”  …

Farking Snapfish.

So I was back to the drawing board.

Turns out K-Mart is my new best friend when it comes to printing photographs and having gifts made up.

Although it means having to listen to appalling excuses for humanity on shopping centre escalators say: “That whole Syria thing … I don’t see a problem here, I just see Muslims killing Muslims.”

He actually said that. Loudly.

Despair rippled through my flesh and settled in my bones. How do people bypass their humanity like that?

The ocean let me down too (but I can forgive it). I took the youngest there on Saturday morning and it was already stinking hot at 9.20am. I had a splash then retreated to the sand to put my sun frock back on and sit cross-legged with a towel over my head so the sun couldn’t frazzle me to a crisp while the youngest frolicked.

The youngest was up for an extended frolic. She took the surfboard she got for her birthday and decided she was going to keep riding waves until she learned to stand up on the board. Eventually she settled for learning to ride it on her knees. She was VERY pleased with herself, despite being dumped badly by two waves.

 

She’s such a determined little marvel and wonder.

I, on the other hand, was a grumpy, sweaty mess. And the traffic home was a NIGHTMARE.

On Saturday afternoon, my incredibly talented friend Megan turned up with my annual gingerbread creation. This year it was a Millenium Falcon (a fabulous follow up to previous years featuring a Tardis and a Dalek), which was kinda lost on the youngest who would have been more receptive to a Full House gingerbread house. Sacrilege. But I thought it was AWESOME.

On Saturday night my ex and I took the youngest to sushi train for dinner and then her end-of-year gymnastics concert, which involved sitting through three hours of gymnastics for a three-minute performance featuring the youngest. Fortunately the venue let attendees buy glasses of wine and take them into the auditorium.

I rounded out the weekend with what DD described as “Housegoeshome northern beaches branch Xmas party” at DD’s local with a few of his friends who read the blog and were quite entertained by his contribution a few weeks back. After a couple of bevvies, we adjourned to a nearby Greek restaurant and proceeded to horrify nearby diners with our loud, no-holds-barred naughty storytelling. I told some VERY saucy tales, poor DD.

It was bulk fun, but a looooong drive home.

How did you pass the last weekend before Christmas?

 

Song of the day: John Lennon “Imagine”

 

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s