Not dead, just knackered

Tempting as it was to park ourselves at Mantra Salt and not leave its Truman Show-like surrounds again for seven days, we decided an expedition was in order.

We mentioned to Brisbane-based friends that we were considering Currumbin Wildlife Santuary and they recoiled in horror, suggesting we check out the baby polar bear at Sea World instead. Fortunately the kids weren’t in hearing range as we’d told them the “worlds” were way too far away for a day trip.

The “worlds” also promised to be crazy busy in January, so we consulted Trip Advisor on just how crap Currumbin would be.

Geez I hate public comment forums, they should be renamed public whinge forums, because that’s mostly what people do on them.

But we waded through the “they only had a salad and a cake that were gluten-free – not good enough!” bitching and noted that overall the place got 4.5 stars. (And Sea World had some sort of SpongeBob parade, which made Husband shudder.)

So daggy old Currumbin it was. And we had heaps of fun … When we finally got there.

I’d rallied the troops so we’d arrive in time for the giant eel feeding at 9.30am, but it wasn’t to be. I hustled everyone into the car nice and early … only to discover the battery was flat. An hour and a new battery later we discovered Husband had left the interior light on four days prior while emptying the car of luggage.

Bummer.

Then we had to stop at South Tweed Kmart for sneakers so Husband could do the high ropes course (it turned out you could hire shoes for $2 a pair but we weren’t to know that).

So we only arrived a little after 10.30am … Also missing the magic show and some sort of creature show.

We headed straight to the high ropes to avoid the heat and the rush. I took a few atmospheric photos, then retired my gammy hip to the cafe for a Pepsi Max (ew) and a little Alan Jones/Kathleen Folbigg fall-out management.

Hours later – and virtually all my iPhone & iPad battery power drained – my sweaty, tired family returned. We grabbed a quick burger (quite good – beetroot, mixed leaves and everything) then tottered over to the bird show and the Australiana sheep shearing show (both fascinating).

Afterwards we staggered back through the heat to the kangaroo enclosure and met the most laid back emus and roos EVER. I’d watched kids stroking emus while sipping on my Pepsi Max earlier in the day and thought “there’s an easy way to lose an eyeball” but the emus were surprisingly jiggy with being treated like soft toys.

As for the kangaroos, they were so relaxed about their human visitors they corpsed out in the most awesome positions for you to take photos and freak people out on social media like I did with the shot below … Which i captioned “Not dead, just knackered” … I’m very proud of it.

Sadly the famous lorikeet feeding at 4pm was a bust. My kids were determined to attract a bird to their tin plate of sweet stuff but no dice. Thirty minutes later they were the last visitors to relinquish their untouched dishes.

Bummer.

The staff said it was the heat or the lack of rain or the ibises or something and provided a python for a free photo session as compensation.

Husband noted as we were leaving that it was probably our last-ever visit (I went as a kid and we took ours as much littler ones three years ago) and I replied “Noooo – we’ll bring the grandkids!”

Didn’t that make him smile wanly …

What’s your favourite attraction on the Gold Coast?