When I worked in magland, punters who said they read Marie Claire and WHO because they thought it was the clarsy thing to say – not because they actually did – annoyed the bejezus out of me. Stand up and be proud of your monthly/weekly mag fix, I say, no matter how trashy it may be. Magazines are about escapism, not impressing people. So, I really didn’t want to choose WHO again this week, I wanted to share the love. But I don’t give a flying f about My Kitchen Rules. Never watched an episode, have no idea who they are. Well, I have a vague idea who Manu is, but not enough to care about his love life. WHO, on the other hand, has trotted out that weekly magazine classic – celebrities who are WASTING AWAY. The pics are absolutely frickin’ awesome. Melanie Griffith’s bony chest and legs … lordy! Eat something woman or you’ll resemble an Egyptian mummy sans bandages. Ooops, too late, you already do. Rachel Zoe? Meh, she’s a nutter. But still, that’s some freaky ribcage action she’s got going on. At the other end of the spectrum, Jessica Simpson’s calorific mac ‘n cheese diet means she resembles the girl who turned into a blueberry in Charlie And The Chocolate Factory, without the blueness. My smuthounds of choice, Lainey Gossip, tell me Jess charged a motza for the baby shower pics, so I’m pretty keen to see if they’re worth the dosh. Congratulations, WHO, I’m so looking forward to snuggling up with you tonight.