How would you rate 2019?

Just before Christmas, I was midway through a moan about life to my hairdresser when he held up his hand and said: “Stop, that’s enough. I’ve spent the past few weeks listening to people moan all day and I can’t deal with it any more.”

Oh! OK …

“Let’s find something funny to talk about – I need a laugh,” he added.

So I told him some amusing anecdotes about my whacked life and we giggled and I gave him a hug and apologised for being such a downer.

I lost my Christmas spirit this year … I lost my spirit generally after a challenging 12 months.

I’d like to get it back in 2020.

2019 was not my favourite year. DD asked me to rate it out of 10 as we were toasting the New Year and I pegged it at a 6.

It was arduous on many fronts, emotionally, health-wise and financially.

But it wasn’t a total blow out. I put together photo albums filled with highlights of the year for the paternal and maternal grandparents and they paint a fortunate picture.

I’ve toasted glorious sunrises with caffeine on Avalon headland and sunsets at Clareville Beach with pink bubbles, been invited to endless fancy events through my job – from whisky tasting on the QE2 to private dinners at some of Sydney’s top restaurants – I took the kids on holidays to Lennox Head and we headed to Bluesfest to marvel at the joyous energy of Iggy Pop, I’ve watched the youngest skip her way to being 13-year-old Australian Champion and the eldest win the People’s Choice Award at the local art competition, I had a fabulous few days in Perth with DD on a business trip, and a sensational week with him in New Zealand.

That’s a pretty awesome line-up really. It seems a bit ungrateful to only give the year six out of 10.

But being in my 50s has turned out to be a tougher slog than I imagined it would be. Rearing two teenagers and juggling all the balls that keep a single mum’s life functional is pretty exhausting when your body has decided it’s getting on.

I’ve been off work since the Friday before Christmas and I’ve virtually done nothing with the precious time. There has been a lot of lying on the couch, struggling to keep my eyes open.

When they are open, I flick through news items and remind myself that at least I’m not huddled on a smoke-filled beach on the South Coast of NSW, wondering if my house has burnt to the ground, struggling to breathe and nervously awaiting an RFS alert to shelter in the water from the flames.

Just awful.

But, like my hairdresser said, it doesn’t help to wallow in the gloom. You need to keep laughing and finding things to look forward to doing.

The year ahead is already lining up to have some high points: I’m off to Canada for the World Skipping Championships for example!

And, after having an empty house for a while, it’s starting to refill. The eldest returned on New Year’s Eve and we watched a movie on the couch together last night. The youngest is back on Friday, she will be dragging me to Australia’s first Brandi Melville store in Bondi Junction, no doubt.

Through it all there is always DD. Five years on from our first fateful RSVP date, we’s still going strong. And I can’t wait to spend another year with him.

And let’s see what 2020 throws at me … my loins are girded and I’m getting ready for the fray.

What are you looking forward to doing in 2020?