All glittery with anger

hedwig

Ex-Husband called me from a pay phone yesterday to confess he’s left the country on a “mini-break.”

Well … I’m guessing he’s left the country because of the pay phone and the fact he informed me later in the conversation he could only be reached via text or email.

And you can guess the identity of his travelling companion.

When I frostily asked if he was calling to provide contact details in case there was an emergency with the kids, he hesitated. So I’m not sure whether THAT had occurred to him.

Oh, it had to be the kids. There’s no other reason to put himself in the line of fire, he’s beyond the guilty conscience stage.

I’m not surprised he was so nervous about telling me. I reacted rather violently when he asked me to mind the kids a few months ago – on his custody days – so he could go on hols with his dearly beloved.

I yelled and slammed doors. It was not pretty. I thought it was a bit rich, a little “sensitivity chip missing”, all things considered.

I’ve been examining why I’m so cross this time, now so much more water has passed under the bridge.

It’s not because I wish it was me on the mini-break with him. Our marriage and my feelings for him are beyond resurrection.

But it still hurts that he’s all loved up and lazing around in some paradise while I’m languishing alone with a bruised heart in Sydney.

I just don’t see the justice in it all. There is none.

So I kept my voice cold and clipped during his call. But I refrained from saying “I hope you have an awful time and catch some hideous tropical disease that makes your dick fall off.”

I wanted to tell him off for being so irresponsible – and cowardly – to leave the country without informing his co-parent. But I was feeling a little too fragile for an argument.

(Or am I over-reacting? I have no perspective when it comes to the ugly source of my divorce.)

I left work feeling a bit bleak last night. Then I got a tweet that made me giggle. Bless social media for being kinder than it’s been cruel to me.

It was from a fellow blogger called Miss Cackle who wrote: “Oh golly. I just said something was “bulk fun”. I had no clue for a moment where I got it from. *coughs* You’re infectious, Alana House!”

Some bulk fun would be nice right now. Bring it on. I’m ready and waiting.

Song of the day: Boomtown Rats “Tell me why I don’t like Mondays”

And since I’ve used Neil Patrick Harris from Hedwig and The Angry Inch as my featured image … purely because when you Google “angry” and “glittery” that’s what you get …

Don’t you LOVE IT?

 

 

 

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