Knocked around

There is only a four-hour time difference between Hawaii and Sydney but it felt like an eternity yesterday.

I woke at 2am, which was 6am Oahu time and tossed and turned before giving up on sleep at 5am. Then I struggled wearily off to work with the wrong laptop.

Cue a shambolic day trying to catch up on emails and tasks without full access to my work apps while in a haze of exhaustion.

Last night was equally unsettled – I woke at 3.30am and it took forever to get back to sleep.

Those long flights home erase a bit of the relaxed holiday vibe. But we’re still happy we made the trip to Maui.

Waikiki, on the other hand, left us pretty cold. That surprised me as it was once my all-time favourite holiday spot.

My disappointment didn’t stop me feeling slightly traumatized that DD didn’t like it, as my ex wasn’t a fan either.

It brought back a lot of memories, some happy but others not.

I took my mum to Hawaii in my early 20s for a whirlwind tour of three islands and returned four times after that to Waikiki, including for my 40th birthday.

My fifth visit remains etched in my mind for all the wrong reasons. The kids and I cruised to Hawaii aboard a Royal Caribbean ship with my parents, sister and nephew. My ex stayed behind in Sydney and reluctantly flew to meet us in Honolulu.

He yearned to take the kids to destinations that were more challenging, Angkor Wat is one of the places that springs to mind. My preference was for family holidays in easy, uncomplicated spots infuriated him.

He had absolutely no interest in joining us on the cruise, which visited Auckland and Tahiti on its way to Hawaii.

Towards the end of the 18-day voyage I blogged that I missed him and I was excited to see him at the wharf when we disembarked.

But I will never forget the moment he hugged the kids in delight and didn’t look me in the eye.

I subconsciously registered that it was odd and filed it away as too difficult to unpack. Looking back it was one of the many signs that my marriage was in trouble that I was too scared to face.

The holiday that followed had its highlights. There were sunset cocktails and coconut shrimp on the lawn of the gorgeous Halekelani hotel while a trio of musicians played Blue Hawaii.

I shopped up a storm and occasionally put a tentative toe in the ocean because I had an aversion to water back then.

Flamingos wandered around the grounds of our hotel and turtles paddled in a pond.

Less idyllic was the guy walking down the street screaming obscenities while wielding a live duck wearing a lei, which he inveigled passers-by to perch on their shoulders for a photo and a fee. The eldest was desperate to take him up on the offer. The youngest just kept asking: “what does f@#k mean?”

On our last night we strolled along the beach to the strains of a cover band singing YMCA, the eldest took a fully clothed dip in the sea and fireworks exploded in the sky above our hotel. 

DD and I retraced many of those steps on our visit, but a lot has changed since then, both in Waikiki and in me.

I used to love Hawaii for the shopping, food and Americana.

Those things don’t excite me the way they once did. I prefer natural beauty and places were the people are few and the wildlife is abundant.

I have have two holidays booked in the next 12 months that will tick both those boxes. I can’t wait to share the highs with you.

Song of the day: Madonna “Holiday”