That was awkward

I had a very awkward experience on the bus yesterday.

It involved me carrying a satellite dish on public transport, as you do.

The satellite dish belongs to a colleague who purchased it so he could work remotely while crossing the Nullarbor in a Kombi Van, as you do.

And it’s been gathering dust ever since … as has the Kombi, which broke down repeatedly on the ill-fated journey.

I borrowed the satellite dish because I am going to a music festival on a farm where there is no mobile phone reception and DD needs to make a work call at 10.30pm on the Friday night, as you do.

So we’re using my colleague’s satellite to connect to Starlink.

Satellite dishes have shrunk a lot over the years. When I think of them I am swept back to that awesome movie The Dish.

But this nifty little unit fits into something that looks like an overnight bag.

It also feels relatively light when you first sling it over your shoulder, but becomes increasingly heavy as you trudge to and from the bus stop.

The streets around Wynyard are a zoo at peak hour. The bus stops have not been designed to accommodate the hundreds of people who snake back and forth on the narrow path around them waiting for a ride home. Getting to your stop involves edging through very tight spaces.

There’s also a fair bit of barging that goes on, so I got some very dirty looks from blokes who made the mistake of slamming into my satellite, which may be compact but has some very hard edges.

Back off mate, I’m packing heat.

I also looked a bit like a human packhorse as I staggered onto the bus with my satellite, two laptops and a handbag.

Anyhoo, the satellite is now sitting safely on my kitchen bench and I’m signing off for the week as I am hoping to attend the opening of something called The Pleasure Club tonight.

Odd Culture Group is launching the late-night venue in Newtown and promises it’s “going to be chock full of pleasurable things that allay your misery and elate you”.

Sounds exciting in theory as I lie here in bed at 6.30am in the morning … as for getting there after work … the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak, so who knows …

Have a great weekend and I’ll give you the lowdown on my exploits on Monday.

Song of the day: Harry Styles “Satellite”