Killing my unicorns

My life was all unicorns and rainbows yesterday, I was skipping through fields of imaginary daffodils trilling “The hills are alive!”

Life is sooooooo, sooooo lovely, I thought as I hummed my way through work, I am sooooo happy …

Then I took my eldest daughter to see Suicide Squad and my sweet dreams were summarily gunned down.

Suicide Squad is horrible. I didn’t like it at all.

DD took his youngest to see Suicide Squad on Saturday night. They both gave it the thumbs up. DD said my daughter would love it.

My daughter DID love it. I felt like my soul was being stained.

The movie ends all perky – much like Margot Robbie’s barely-satin-clad character’s body – but it starts out VERY dark.

I don’t like VERY dark.

And I really, really don’t like seeing human beings doing terrible things to other human beings.

I don’t mind watching Orcs getting their heads cleaved with axes in Lord of the Rings … somehow that’s different. Both movies dwell in the realm of fantasy, but there’s something a bit too grim about Suicide Squad for me.


The way The Joker sends Margot’s character Harley Quinn insane is particularly disturbing.

As I was sitting in the darkened theatre thinking Thank heavens I didn’t bring the youngest along to see this … that would make me a VERY bad mother. I’m just a BAD mother because I took my 12-year-old to see this …

I also vaguely recalled my ex-husband expressing distaste for the concept of Suicide Squad when he picked the kids up on Sunday. He mentioned something about being really disturbed by finally watching one of the Batman movies recently, the one with Heath Ledger as The Joker. I think he said he disliked it so much he wouldn’t be watching any of the other installments.

I should have listened better.

My ex and I have very little in common these days, but we share a similar shudder level when it comes to a certain type of movie.

Early in our relationship we went to see Cape Fear. He made me leave the cinema after Robert De Niro bit a chunk out of a woman’s cheek. He was deeply traumatised. I wasn’t enjoying the movie much either, but I was MORTIFIED that everyone in the cinema would think we were leaving because I was the lily-livered one.

I wanted to shout – as we slunk down the dark aisle – “We’re leaving because of HIM! Not ME!”

Anyways, back to the Suicide Squad effect … all my unicorns prancing through fields of daffodils have been brutally slain.

Oddly, now I think of it, one of the villains in Suicide Squad carries a stuffed, pink unicorn around in his jacket.

No idea why. Random.

Even more oddly, Jared Leto looks about 12 years old playing The Joker in Suicide Squad.

I told the eldest that Jared Leto is a freak of nature because he has to be MY age and I’m ancient.

OK, I just Googled Jared Leto’s age – he’s 44. Not nearly as ancient as me, but still unnaturally youthful looking. I think he must have drunk all my unicorns’ blood.

I miss my unicorns.

Give me a romantic comedy ANY DAY. Or some Orc slaying. Anything but Suicide Squad.

How about you?

Song of the day: Katrina and the Waves “Walking on sunshine” (well, I WAS)





3 thoughts on “Killing my unicorns

  1. I don’t like any movie that glorifies or glamorises violence. I made the mistake of watching the beginning of Saw a few years ago. That sort of violence should be banned. Mind you I remember sitting waiting for my five kids to come out of the cinema one day and a father walked out with his kid complaining about the NASTY NASTY movie. I was very worried about what they were seeing but the movie was Mouse Hunt… very tame. I don’t know what he was fussing about.

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