Can an introvert change their spots?

Me and my lovely Dutch gym instructor Lianne.
Me and my lovely Dutch gym instructor Lianne.

I decided last night that the blog was becoming waaaaaay too self-absorbed. I resolved to write something funny or insightful, but I just couldn’t rouse myself from the sofa to type. I was so bloody tired after only one hour of sleep on Wednesday night.

So you’re stuck with the me-me-me blog I started tapping out during my lunch break at work yesterday, in between amusing myself by being paid to write about Burger King selling black cheeseburgers in Japan (thank you Luke for the tip) and compiling a gallery of crazy fast foods from around the world. Although I mainly just stared at the second-by-second figures on how my stories were doing around the country – it was a particularly healthy day because not only were the black burgers a runaway hit but, out of the blue, a story I wrote on Monday about “ethnic” foods that don’t exist in their home countries suddenly went off like a double bunger.

It would seem I’m a little self AND food obsessed this week …

Anyways, here’s the blog that I started that you’re stuck with:

Can someone, at the ripe old age of 46, convert from introvert to extrovert?

I always thought those sort of character traits were kinda set in stone.

But something weird has happened since Husband left. I’ve “come out of my shell”.

Prior to Husband leaving – and I swear it had nothing to do with him – I would pretend to be outgoing, but secretly quake.

Nowadays you can send me anywhere, introduce me to anyone, and I’m off like a bullet train.

The delightful Pinky Poinker chatted with me on Facebook recently and said: “I never would have thought you’d be an introvert … That shocks me! I was thinking you were a society party girl.”

I am SO NOT a society party girl … Although I’m quite excited to have been invited to my Dutch gym instructor’s 40th karaoke party, does that count? My gym buddy, who has also been invited, said I shouldn’t feel obliged to go and I was like Are you kidding me? I am SO there, it will be FILLED with 40-year-old European men … Maybe … Hopefully …

(Oh, and of course I’ll be able to toast my lovely gym instructor too …)

Normally such invites would have filled me with terror. But I’m prepared to do just about anything to avoid the men on RSVP for the moment, no matter how much people tell me it rocks.

The idea of getting to know single men (organically), even it it’s just as friends, quite fascinates me. The relationship you have with blokes as married/de facto men is so completely different and constrained.

Are these the words of an introvert? Or just someone who’s a little hyper with panic about her new life?

Gawd knows. But I do seem a little breathless.

Huffington Post has this to say about introverts:

Not sure if you’re an innie or an outie? See if any of these 23 telltale signs of introversion apply to you.

1. You find small talk incredibly cumbersome.

2. You go to parties -– but not to meet people. (At a party, most introverts would rather spend time with people they already know and feel comfortable around.)

3. You often feel alone in a crowd.

4. Networking makes you feel like a phony.

5. You’ve been called “too intense.”

6. You’re easily distracted.

7. Downtime doesn’t feel unproductive to you.

8. Giving a talk in front of 500 people is less stressful than having to mingle with those people afterwards.

10. You start to shut down after you’ve been active for too long.

Do you start to get tired and unresponsive after you’ve been out and about for too long? It’s likely because you’re trying to conserve energy.

11. You’re in a relationship with an extrovert.

12. You’d rather be an expert at one thing than try to do everything.

13. You actively avoid any shows that might involve audience participation.

Because really, is anything more terrifying?

15. You notice details that others don’t.

16. You have a constantly running inner monologue.

17. You have low blood pressure.

18. You’ve been called an “old soul” -– since your 20s.

19. You don’t feel “high” from your surroundings.

20. You look at the big picture.

When describing the way that introverts think, Jung explained that they’re more interested in ideas and the big picture rather than facts and details.

21. You’ve been told to “come out of your shell.”

22. You’re a writer.

Introverts are often better at communicating in writing than in person.

23. You alternate between phases of work and solitude, and periods of social activity.

Hmmmm, I think I just failed the test. I can tick Nos 10, 13, 16, 17, 20 and 22 … but the rest … not so much.

How about you? Innie or outie?

Song of the day: Bananarama “He used to be a shy boy”



9 thoughts on “Can an introvert change their spots?

Add yours

  1. Recently i did a personality test online for a bit of fun- and the results were the same as they were twenty years ago! INFJ still!

      1. Not sure- I was just super surprised. Life is all about change, growth and development so I had expected my results to have changed. That being said, you have been through so many huge life changing events in recent times, that change is inevitable- you had no choice but to adapt to new circumstances. (And you have done so with great courage!)

        Short answer- leopards can change their spots! 🙂

  2. Good lord, that test was an eye opener. I am 100% introvert (with an ex-extrovert partner). Keep up the breathless bravery 🙂 x

      1. You should have seen me in leadup to our lunch! I was sooo happy that you also confirmed details and so nervous that I wouldn’t know what to talk about and so relieved you were on time. But I try to fight that anxious, overthinking side. When I read your blogs now it makes me smile to read your side of it!

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