It’s multi-factorial

How was your weekend? I went for walks, helped cooked a birthday lunch for DD’s mum … and was filled with an overwhelming urge to buy stuff.

That can mean only one thing: I am shopping my feelings.

Warning: I am about to complain. Please forgive me. Complaining is very dull.

I have been trying to work out why I am shopping my feelings and I think, as DD would say, it’s multi-factorial.

I am really sad that the youngest has moved out.
I haven’t had proper relaxed time alone with DD for ages.
I haven’t been for a swim in the ocean in forever due to bad weather and other interference.
I accidentally cut in front of a bus driver in the city on Saturday and he pulled up beside me at the traffic lights, opened his door and started shouting at me.
My body hurts a lot because of whatever is wrong with my spine/sacrum/hip.
I am tired because my sore body is making it hard to sleep. (And also probably because I am middle-aged.)
I am overweight and have no discipline.
I have stupidly agreed to undertake another massive project. I should know better.
I have to go to the periodontist this afternoon. (In case you haven’t encountered one, they’re a gum dentist. My regular dentist suggested I needed to see one. I am not expecting it to be pleasant.)
I have to go to the doctor on Wednesday to find out my MRI results. Whatever they are will probably require unpleasant needles or an operation. If it is an operation I will not be able to drive for up to six weeks, among other inconveniences.
I have been totally deaf in one ear since mid-last week, my head is filled with constant ringing and the first available appointment to have my ear vacuumed is on Friday.

That will do for now.

The objects that I am obsessing over to soothe my sadness are handbags. Not expensive leather numbers, just fun ones – the thought of spending more than $150 on a handbag fills me with horror.

But buying the fun ones has become a painful desire inside me. And under $150 ones can still add up if you are reckless.

The urge was so strong yesterday that I excused myself from post-lunch chitter chat during DD’s mum’s birthday so I could dash to Avalon and buy one that has been twirling around in my head ever since I saw it months ago in a shop window while buying bagels at Bonfire Bread.

I also want to buy a silver one I saw in a window in Mona Vale, but for some weird reason the shop wasn’t open on Sunday even though the website said it was.

Because I couldn’t check it out I want it even more badly. I have combed the shop’s website to try and see how much it is and it wasn’t there.

But I did spot an indigo slouchy jute one while I was searching that has filled me with longing.

This is not normal behaviour for me. I’d be lucky to buy a handbag once a year, usually in safe colours such as black or navy, and I use them until they have worn edges.

I need to find a distraction other than shopping.

DD would prefer the distraction didn’t involve me bombarding him with links to potential cruises we could go on in 2026.

But he HAS agreed that I can sign us up for a Hurtigruten information night. He let it slip that if he could do anything it would be the Hurtigruten cruise that does the mail run up the Norwegian coastline.

Anyhoo, bring on the short week and I hope you are in higher spirits than me.

Song of the day: Harry Chapin “Cat’s in the cradle”