Loving this story my friend told me about her girlfriend’s house alarm going off recently …
The police rang to say there had been a robbery. She rushed home and was met by two cops at her front door, who gravely warned: “Prepare yourself, they’ve given the place a pretty good going over.”
She walked inside and realised it looked exactly the way she’d left it that morning – a total tip. They asked if anything was missing. She stuttered something like Nothing major, thank you officers …
Eventually she confessed it was the normal state of her home, due to having three teenage sons. No need to file a report.
I laughed and laughed and laughed.
When I finally stopped laughing, I thought, Oh god, that will be me one day.
How about you? What would do you? Pretend to be horrified that robbers have trashed your house or confess that’s what the place always looks like?
It’s a bit like your mum telling you to always wear clean undies, in case you get hit by a bus. Always tidy up so you know if you’ve been robbed …
housegoeshome 
Ha ha! I love that one! “No, officer, I don’t know why the robbers would have tipped a bowl of weetbix on the floor and walked through it before scattering lego all over the loungeroom! It certainly wasn’t like that when I went out for coffee with my girlfriends this morning!”
Oh my god, we have to stop writing about the same things! I just hit publish on my blog post where I mentioned that the police did indeed arrive at my house once and comment that it had been done over really well, I did not tell them that they actually hadn’t disturbed anything. Because I prefer to keep up the facade to the world that I am a clean living, fully functioning adult and not a gross slob who can’t manage to keep her house in order.
a friend of mine got broken into & the house trashed more… only way she knew for sure was that she was pretty sure her kids hadnt actually thrown eggs on the walls…
I think I could milk the situation. I could use it as an excuse for all the household stuff that’s gone missing – like that’s why I cant find your purple fairy wand.. the robbers took it. Big demand on the black market for fairy palaver you know.
Love Mumabulous
I’m not sure whether to be embarrassed or relieved that I feel in such good company! I’m a bit like little Grace in the patience ditty, when I’m neat I’m very very neat (obsessively so) but when I’m not, I’m horrid. As are we all in our family. I look at it this way … at least if someone breaks in, they’ll turn around and leave saying, someone’s already been here!!!
Ha! I don’t think I would have confessed but just shock my head ‘look what they’ve done too my entire clean and organised house!’