I don’t know how the Gen Ys do it. How do they follow their favourite websites, Twitter and Facebook and still have time for an actual face-to-face life? I’ve heard the trick is to consume everything simultaneously - listen to music on your iPod while typing on your laptop, checking your iPhone’s Twitter feed and drinking a can of Mother.
But I’m exhausted by it.
Recently, someone asked me to do a Twitter round-up blog. You know, a guide to what celebs have been saying this week. So I started following loads of celebs on Twitter. And do you know what they’re saying? Nothing worth repeating. Unless you fancy three-way blathers from the Kardashians about fluff and nonsense or blow-by-blow accounts of Neil Patrick Harris’s latest 8-course dinner. Even though no-one’s saying much, it’s still pretty arduous trawling through tweets from the 269 people I follow. Because it never stops. The tweets keep popping up 24-hours a day seven days a week. And then there’s the pressure to tweet myself. I’ll suddenly realise it’s been days since I tweeted anything and frantically try to think of witty remarks, then hurriedly write them while serving the Sprogs breakfast, then realise they’re full of spelling mistakes.
Facebook ebbs and flows but it’s pretty crowded too. In the interest of politeness I feel I should regularly “like” stuff, make the occasional comment and come up with something entertaining myself once in a while. I often fall down on the last point and run the risk of becoming one of “those people” who just use Facebook as a promotional tool.
Then there are the endless websites. When I switch on my computer in the morning, the SMH comes up as my home page, giving me a quick glimpse of the horror and mayhem that’s taken place overnight. Throughout the day, I try to touch base with The Hoopla, Mamamia, Lainey Gossip and Kidspot. I wish I had time to check out Daily Life, because going on the stuff that pops up on my Facebook newsfeed it seems interesting, but I don’t.
I write two blogs a day, which is 14 a week. And I often panic about having nothing to say. You know you’ve hit a low-point when you start resenting another blogger for having her maxi-dress blow above her head at her son’s tennis lesson while everyone watched because, damn her, she had something funny to write about. Lucky bitch. Which brings me to other people’s blogs. Reading other people’s blogs and commenting on them is the key to getting other people to read your blog and comment on it. But geez it’s hard to squeeze in.
I’m not sure it’s healthy either, to be so enmeshed in social media. It’s an addictive drug that consumes your every waking moment. You check everything obsessively so you don’t miss anything. You’re so busy checking everything that you only semi-present when you’re with your family or friends. As @MiaFreedman tweeted a couple of days ago: “Check inbox, twitter, Facebook, instagram, website comments, start again. Again. Again.” Yup, that’s me too. With www.domain.com thrown in for good measure.
Oh, then there’s my mobile phone. I’m hopeless at answering it and not much better at writing and replying to texts. But I’m terrified I’ll forget something and leave someone in the lurch (usually my sister) so I find myself at traffic lights frantically scrolling around and badly typing as I wait.
Thank god we don’t have a TV antennae at our place, or my head might go pop from information overload. But I’m thinking I might have to get one so I understand the appeal of popular shows like The Voice. I write a blog every Monday for Kidspot on the magazine I bought that week and I reckon the point of the column should be the magazine I recommend other people buy each week. How do I accurately judge that if I’m not watching TV regularly?
I’d like to know how other people keep up with it all. So please, give me some tips.
I’m also wondering if there’s some miraculous website that will collate all my web interests in one place so I can follow everything more easily. If there isn’t, does someone want to create one with me? I reckon it would go gangbusters.